I was a very nervous nurser when I had my daughter (my only child). In Arizona our mothers' lounge was accessed through the bathroom. There wasn't any kind of ventilation and the chairs were rejects from someone's basement. There wasn't any sound piped in and you heard EVERYTHING that happened in the bathroom magnified. It turns out there was a nicer mothers' lounge elsewhere in the building but I didn't find it until much later.
-Arizona, United States
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I spent much of my breastfeeding time with my first child at church trying to anticipate others' reactions and accommodate them. I always went to the mothers lounge, no matter the hour in church, and even used a cover there because I saw a friend doing that. Eventually I got ok with no cover in the mothers lounge when I saw others not using one (again, just trying to follow others' cues about what was accepted).
With my second, I became more comfortable using a cover in sacrament meeting in class, realizing that if someone had a problem with that then it was their issue. But when baby started to get wiggly while eating, I banished myself back to the mothers lounge. Then one miraculous day in RS, a friend just started nursing without cover or anything. And I knew she wasn't as progressive as me. So she really gave me the courage to start nursing in there without a cover. It changed my experience so much, not struggling to keep me and baby covered in vain, and still being able to be present and hear the lesson and participate. I never got the courage to nurse without a cover anywhere other than RS. But it was still liberating and a positive experience. There is still the same mother's room in our ward building. It is small and windowless, but it has 2 comfortable chairs and a fold down changing table. I used it regularly on Sundays 30+years ago.
-United States 11 years ago we were living in Logan, UT. We had recently moved there from Salt Lake. At this time I was nursing my 3rd child (2nd living). In Salt Lake I would nurse during sacrament meeting without anyone batting an eye. I would stay in the chapel if it was close to the sacrament so I didn’t miss it. I also nursed in RS as well.
So imagine my shock when I am pulled into the bishops office in Logan and told I am making the young men uncomfortable because I am nursing during the sacrament. My husband told the bishop that he was sure the young men aren’t paying attention to me, but if they were it’s good prep for their missions. We discussed how this is a great opportunity to teach the youth what our bodies are made for and that they are in charge of their minds, not me. I told the bishop that under the law, I had the right to breastfeed anywhere I had the right to be and if he wanted to push the issue, I would just stay home. The bishop couldn't understand why I didn't want to be in the Mother's room. I asked if he had ever eaten his lunch in there, it is hot, smells like gross diapers, zero ventilation, and i can't take the sacrament in there. After a LOT of back and forth it came out that the RS president was who complained about me nursing during RS. It was ridiculous and I never felt comfortable in that ward again. I went on to be in several other wards and was always very cautious about breastfeeding in church after that. My confidence was shaken and it made me angry. I was in the YW presidency and nursed my babies in front of those girls all the time. I brought my baby to camp and she nursed whenever she wanted. The only time it was ever an issue was with the one RS President who took it upon herself to shield the YM of the ward. -Logan, Utah, United States I had a bishop whose wife would breastfeed in the middle of sacrament meeting (no cover.) I was amazed and quite impressed. So when I had my first baby I knew it would not be a big deal if I did the same. I was called as YW President at the same time my husband was YM President in that ward...with a 3 month old. I breastfed my baby during Ward Council and not once did I feel uncomfortable or shamed. My baby needed fed and my voice needed to be heard in that meeting. Our Bishop was glad to have me participate and take care of my most important job, motherhood, at the same time.
This was 20ish years ago but I remember my daughter never liked anything over her when she was fed and I hated messing around with covers. I became very adept at beginning and ending a feeding so as not to flash anyone. -United States Only good experiences here. I breastfed in the mother's lounge because usually I was changing a diaper right before or after, or people would distract my baby and she'd pop off to look around (and get squirted). But I also did breastfeed in the foyer and in RS, with and without covers. At one point we had 6 or so babies of the same age, so one mom took the initiative and made a second mother's lounge with donated chairs, changing table etc. It was great!
-United States |
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